This has to be the ultimate definition of "silly" from the history of film. The following clip is from the Bollywood film "Alluda Majaka" (1996) starring the Indian Chuck Norris; Chiranjeevi.
Please notice the toughest and most versatile horse in the world.
Saturday, 6 February 2010
A horrid lapse in standards
*WARNING* severe lowering of standards immediate!
This will soon be remedied and hopefully not repeated. Howard Stern is not suitable for anything and should be appreciated as much as a dose of clap or a medium size car to the head.
However, the following clip goes to show the value of practicing one's spoken English.
http://collette.com.au/KoreanClockLady.mp3
Once more, I'm sorry.
This will soon be remedied and hopefully not repeated. Howard Stern is not suitable for anything and should be appreciated as much as a dose of clap or a medium size car to the head.
However, the following clip goes to show the value of practicing one's spoken English.
http://collette.com.au/KoreanClockLady.mp3
Once more, I'm sorry.
Sir Bob Ferry
I just found this film on youtube:
Due to not having been conceived yet at the time I am unable to confirm that this is real and not a parody. Sir Bob's swaggering and slightly out of rhythmn movements and his facial expressions should certainly suggest the latter.
This is not to say the song isn't great, of course. I wonder if there was ever a lady who would find this dance sexually attractive or not...
Due to not having been conceived yet at the time I am unable to confirm that this is real and not a parody. Sir Bob's swaggering and slightly out of rhythmn movements and his facial expressions should certainly suggest the latter.
This is not to say the song isn't great, of course. I wonder if there was ever a lady who would find this dance sexually attractive or not...
Thursday, 4 February 2010
Whatever happened to Dustolv?
The Norwegian public has a constant thirst for idiots. This is because idiots make it smart, successful and sophisticated by comparison. By reading about people doing stupid things and getting themselves into complicated situations we can not only enjoy seeing them reap what they sow and revel in the unlikelihood of the same happening to us, but we can also huff at their receiving attention. However, the joy of learning about idiots offing themselves is a genuine biological feeling.
Everyone has some degree of concern for the future of human kind. Seeing how a member of the more shallow end of the gene pool has misspelled his own name in graffiti, discussing some matter with a concerned friend of a friend composed of unrighteous wrath and enlightenment in unequal measure or seeing the snotty and obnoxious neighbour kids really makes you appreciate the wonder of contraception.
This is not an expression of social Darwinism. As with any controversial issue; race, sexual orientation, gender, class, I hate everyone irrespective of any physical or personal qualities. It is a natural, biological reaction from when we were all wearing revealing loincloths laughing at Bob Zog falling into the animal pit or being trampled to a wafer thin slice of meaty pancake by a mammoth or feeling the frustration of Bob Zag falling out of the tree spoiling the carefully planned ambush. This is also why we found Dustolv entertaining.
Dustolv went to Africa, worked as an obscure mercenary and shot a Congolese driver in an area full of government soldiers, was duly imprisoned and had his complimentary sub tropic disease. There were calls from the dungeon and the more nationalistic, right wing, tractor-pulling, trailer-inhabiting Norwegians for the intervention of the Norwegian Foreign Office but these were politely slapped down by Sir Bob Gard-Støre. And then, just as we were waiting to hear of Dustolv’s death sentence being converted to life imprisonment, nothing. A new year came… nothing. What happened was that it became cold in December and Norwegian media were somehow surprised. To be fair, one might say that the Norwegian Minister of Fishing and major fish farm tycooness stole some of his limelight by being extraordinary blockheaded, but still; nothing. I hate to sound saucy, but it seems Dustolv was milked dry by the Norwegian media and left to rot.
This also goes to show that the attention span and consistency of the Norwegian public and their opinion are disappointingly short. We are not really concerned with the fate of idiots although we would like to think so. What we really want is five minutes of snorting resentment at the breakfast table, as the great Sir Bob Fry said, whether it is aimed at wounded national pride as in the Dustolv case or the impertinence of fellow Norwegians such as Jarle Traa, who injured himself in a ridiculous manner in the Himalayas and expected to be saved by the state. For this purpose there are no more fitting groups than the idiots.
Idiots will also be the subject of a later post, where I will introduce and present my favourite Darwin Award winners.
Everyone has some degree of concern for the future of human kind. Seeing how a member of the more shallow end of the gene pool has misspelled his own name in graffiti, discussing some matter with a concerned friend of a friend composed of unrighteous wrath and enlightenment in unequal measure or seeing the snotty and obnoxious neighbour kids really makes you appreciate the wonder of contraception.
This is not an expression of social Darwinism. As with any controversial issue; race, sexual orientation, gender, class, I hate everyone irrespective of any physical or personal qualities. It is a natural, biological reaction from when we were all wearing revealing loincloths laughing at Bob Zog falling into the animal pit or being trampled to a wafer thin slice of meaty pancake by a mammoth or feeling the frustration of Bob Zag falling out of the tree spoiling the carefully planned ambush. This is also why we found Dustolv entertaining.
Dustolv went to Africa, worked as an obscure mercenary and shot a Congolese driver in an area full of government soldiers, was duly imprisoned and had his complimentary sub tropic disease. There were calls from the dungeon and the more nationalistic, right wing, tractor-pulling, trailer-inhabiting Norwegians for the intervention of the Norwegian Foreign Office but these were politely slapped down by Sir Bob Gard-Støre. And then, just as we were waiting to hear of Dustolv’s death sentence being converted to life imprisonment, nothing. A new year came… nothing. What happened was that it became cold in December and Norwegian media were somehow surprised. To be fair, one might say that the Norwegian Minister of Fishing and major fish farm tycooness stole some of his limelight by being extraordinary blockheaded, but still; nothing. I hate to sound saucy, but it seems Dustolv was milked dry by the Norwegian media and left to rot.
This also goes to show that the attention span and consistency of the Norwegian public and their opinion are disappointingly short. We are not really concerned with the fate of idiots although we would like to think so. What we really want is five minutes of snorting resentment at the breakfast table, as the great Sir Bob Fry said, whether it is aimed at wounded national pride as in the Dustolv case or the impertinence of fellow Norwegians such as Jarle Traa, who injured himself in a ridiculous manner in the Himalayas and expected to be saved by the state. For this purpose there are no more fitting groups than the idiots.
Idiots will also be the subject of a later post, where I will introduce and present my favourite Darwin Award winners.
Wednesday, 3 February 2010
Teaching Shakespeare on vocational studies Vol.1
I believe in challenging myself pedagogically. In fact, I find it necessary to do so to avoid getting bored by my job. So, I have decided to spend 3 weeks (three 1,5 h lessons) teaching Shakespeare to my Advanced Zapperclass.
This class consists of 19 boys and 1 (rather bright) girl. The boys are interested in tractors, playing cards and electricity, and not in Shakespeare, poetry or literature about love whatsoever. So, I chose "Romeo and Juliet".
Admittedly, I will spend two of the 5,5 hours watching Baz Luhrmann's "Romeo + Juliet". I find that the modern setting, the guns and the pure drama of the film makes the play more appealing to the students. Also, I get a chance to have them follow their chosen character throughout the film as well as working on both setting, plot and theme. More of this to come.
To start off, I used an edition of my colleague, Lady Liz Tatton's Shakespeare relay race. I placed three pieces of paper with partly overlapping information about Shakespeare in three hard to reach places. Then, I divided the students into groups of three, giving each group a set of questions and a pen. The groups then had to find the information notes and the answer to each question, but they were not allowed to bring any paper. In other words, they had to remember each question and answer while guarding their piece of paper.
Here are some quotes to show how it went:
Zapperkid 1: He was born in 1564.
Zapperkid 2: But we need the date!
Z1: Oh...
Z2: (*hrmpf) Never mind. You take the paper and sit there guarding it. Both of you. I will do this myself (runs off)
Zapperkid 3: His wife was called Ann Hathawaysomething
Zapperkid 4: Ok...
(Z3 runs off, Z4 searches and wonders. Z3 returns)
Z4: Listen, that wasn't the question. You were supposed to find William's age when they married, you idiot.
Z3 (running off again): Oh, shite!
Z4: What did I do to deserve....
Zapperkid 5: Zapperkid 8 is hiding the notes high up! It's unfair, I'm short!
Zapperkid 6: Zapperkid 7 takes photos of of the notes with his cell! STOP NICKING MY PAPER!
In the end, Zapperkid 1 and 2's team won, with great objections. Especially from Zapperkid 7 and 8.
Afterwards, a general introduction to Elizabethan entertainment, the Globe and Shakespeare was given through Terry Deary and Gyldendal Experience Website. An introduction to both Shakespeare (with answers to the race quiz) and Romeo and Juliet was given using power-point (emphasising adaptations and history) and BBC.
This page, by the way, is wonderful for teaching literature, just as this is for teaching Shakespeare!
(Source: Picture: http://stantonssheetmusic.wordpress.com/2009/04/, last visited 3.2.2010)
This class consists of 19 boys and 1 (rather bright) girl. The boys are interested in tractors, playing cards and electricity, and not in Shakespeare, poetry or literature about love whatsoever. So, I chose "Romeo and Juliet".
Admittedly, I will spend two of the 5,5 hours watching Baz Luhrmann's "Romeo + Juliet". I find that the modern setting, the guns and the pure drama of the film makes the play more appealing to the students. Also, I get a chance to have them follow their chosen character throughout the film as well as working on both setting, plot and theme. More of this to come.
To start off, I used an edition of my colleague, Lady Liz Tatton's Shakespeare relay race. I placed three pieces of paper with partly overlapping information about Shakespeare in three hard to reach places. Then, I divided the students into groups of three, giving each group a set of questions and a pen. The groups then had to find the information notes and the answer to each question, but they were not allowed to bring any paper. In other words, they had to remember each question and answer while guarding their piece of paper.
Here are some quotes to show how it went:
Zapperkid 1: He was born in 1564.
Zapperkid 2: But we need the date!
Z1: Oh...
Z2: (*hrmpf) Never mind. You take the paper and sit there guarding it. Both of you. I will do this myself (runs off)
Zapperkid 3: His wife was called Ann Hathawaysomething
Zapperkid 4: Ok...
(Z3 runs off, Z4 searches and wonders. Z3 returns)
Z4: Listen, that wasn't the question. You were supposed to find William's age when they married, you idiot.
Z3 (running off again): Oh, shite!
Z4: What did I do to deserve....
Zapperkid 5: Zapperkid 8 is hiding the notes high up! It's unfair, I'm short!
Zapperkid 6: Zapperkid 7 takes photos of of the notes with his cell! STOP NICKING MY PAPER!
In the end, Zapperkid 1 and 2's team won, with great objections. Especially from Zapperkid 7 and 8.
Afterwards, a general introduction to Elizabethan entertainment, the Globe and Shakespeare was given through Terry Deary and Gyldendal Experience Website. An introduction to both Shakespeare (with answers to the race quiz) and Romeo and Juliet was given using power-point (emphasising adaptations and history) and BBC.
This page, by the way, is wonderful for teaching literature, just as this is for teaching Shakespeare!
(Source: Picture: http://stantonssheetmusic.wordpress.com/2009/04/, last visited 3.2.2010)
Court Case
I have just had the most amazing teaching experience in sportyclass. We read a short story called "Tony's Story" in which the protagonist, Anthony Sousea, a Pueblo Indian, kills a New Mexico state trooper. In New Mexico, this is punishable by death by lethal injection. So we had to stage a court case; "The state of New Mexico vs. Anthony Sousea".
One (bright) student wanted to be the defendant. Then, I described all the roles in the case; we needed:
One (bright) student wanted to be the defendant. Then, I described all the roles in the case; we needed:
- Counsel for the prosecution
- Counsel for the defence
- A jury of about 5 students
- Witnesses
- Character witnesses
- Expert witnesses
I, the teacher was the judge (gavel and all). Then, three students were chosen for each of the counsels. I picked out students of varying skill in order for them to work together. A number of students were not present and these got to be the jury. When they returned their job was to read the short story carefully. Then, two and two students got to represent each witness; friends, the first to get to the scene of the crime, the Governor of the Pueblo, psychologists and so on.
When everyone had got a role, I explained about death penalty and lethal injection in particular. Then, I explained about the procedure of the court case and helped the students by guiding their research. In this case, I had to give the counsels legal advice as best as I knew how ("plead insanity" etc.).
After 1,5 hours of preparation, we arranged the desks as if in a court. Then, I opened the trial by using television phrases ("Hand on the English book and repeat after me: I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth") and invited the counsel for the prosecution to call witnesses. This done, the witnesses were questioned by the prosecution and then cross-examined by the defence, all practicing their speaking skills. Then, the counsel for the defence were allowed to do the same. Most witnesses were called, and the prosecution clinched the deal early by getting the psychologist to give testament to the defendant's sanity. The defence then had to argue self defence, but did so poorly, getting less than optimal testament from Tony's friend Leon.
A few misguided and overruled objections later, the court was told to adjourn after a 10 minute break (while the judge put the desks back in their places and the jury deliberated). The jury, being excessively bloodthirsty, actually asking to prosecute the village priest as well, spent little time in condemning the poor Native American to death. The verdict passed, the students were allowed to leave, and colleagues, who had been wary of such experimental teaching techniques, were informed of the success.
Now I am lending out my gavel to them.
Lovely, German weirdness
Another post in the "Weird and Wonderful" section. This time I've included a strangely catchy German Country song from 1977 called "Papa trinkt Bier". The text goes something like "Daddy drinks beer, Mommy is ill and there are no money in the bank (...) Mr. President, my father has too much spare time, Mr. President, that doesn't work well". What could be more weird and wonderful than a German country song about unemployment and alcoholism?
Ah, yes, a German 90's splatterfilm about "Staplerfahrer Klaus" (Forkliftdriver Klaus)
Update (17.02.2011)
This post presents another case of lovely German weirdness; a German western with a German speaking French actor playing the Apache Winnetou.
Ah, yes, a German 90's splatterfilm about "Staplerfahrer Klaus" (Forkliftdriver Klaus)
Update (17.02.2011)
This post presents another case of lovely German weirdness; a German western with a German speaking French actor playing the Apache Winnetou.
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